Ben Brinkerhoff – Overcoming Resentment – Class 1 – The Seeds of Resentment

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This is day one of the Rocky
Mountain Bible School.

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Our first class is being taught
by our brother Ben Brinkerhoff

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from Christchurch North in New
Zealand.

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His topic overall for the week
is Judah Overcoming Resentment.

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The The title for today’s class
is Judah, The Seeds of

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Resentment, Brother Ben.
OK, good morning, Rocky Band

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Bible school.
All right.

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Wow.
Raise your hand if you are a

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Bringerhoff or married to one.
Thank you for the support.

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Raise your hand if you want to
be married to a Brinkerhoff,

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right?
See Dave and Nancy, I did that

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for you.
Ask that during the teen class

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and get some interesting
responses.

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I think I’ll let you know how
that goes.

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I listen.
I bring warm greetings from your

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brothers and sisters in the
Christchurch, N Ecclesia in New

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Zealand.
My only sadness really is the

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fact my wife Alyssa and my four
children cannot be with me this

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week.
They want me to convey their

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love to you as well.
So you know, Jesus tells us and

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brother Josh, even last night,
he says, listen, there’s two

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great commandments and you know
what they are.

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So the love of the Lord your God
with all your heart, soul, mind

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and strength.
And what’s the other one if also

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love your neighbor as yourself,
right?

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And we and Christian Elphis, we
love, we love this, we love it,

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we like to talk about it, we
like to expound it, we like to

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discuss it, exhort on it.
It’s just the doing it that’s

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hard.
That’s the part that’s the part

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that’s hard.
And you ask yourself the

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question, why?
Why?

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What’s getting in the way?
Listen to love your neighbors

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yourself.
It’s this verse is found in

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Matthew, it’s found in Mark,
it’s found in Luke, it’s found

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in Galatians and Romans.
And if you missed the point,

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it’s found in the book of James.
It’s everywhere, right?

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And what what’s getting in our
way?

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And if you go back to the Rick
of the verse in its original

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context in Leviticus, I think we
get a clue to what the problem

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might be.
OK, Leviticus chapter 19 and

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verse 17 for context.
You shall not hate your brother

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in your heart, but you shall
reason with your neighbor lest

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you bear sin because of him.
You shall not take vengeance or

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bear any grudge against the sons
of your own people, but you

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shall love your neighbor as
yourself.

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I am the Lord so.
So why do we find so much

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trouble following this beautiful
commandment of the Lord?

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Perhaps the reason is, is that
we’re bearing a grudge.

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And if we have hate in our heart
and we’re bearing a grudge, we,

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we can’t love.
It’s it’s like bearing a grudge

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and love.
It’s like they’re these

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opposites.
Admit it.

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If you have, if you are bearing
a grudge in your heart, love is

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very hard.
And if you have a lot of love in

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your heart, you’re probably not
bearing very many grudges.

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These, these things are like
opposites to one another.

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And, and I’d like to talk to you
this week from time to time

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about love, if I can.
But you know, if, if I talk to

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you about love and you’re being
a grudge, it’s like taking a cup

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full of that’s full of water and
putting under a spigot and the,

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the listen, the water’s going to
hit the cup.

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It’s just run over the side.
It’s not going to stick.

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Because if you have a grudge in
your heart that is, that is

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actually preventing you from
from having love.

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So for its simplicity in these
studies I’m going to refer to

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grudges and hate primarily using
this word resentment because

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it’s a word that captures the
attitude of the person I want to

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consider together.
Now resentment comes from 2

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parts of speech.
The first word is re and not as

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in my uncle’s name.
No re as in to do again as in

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restore or replay, right?
You’re doing something again.

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And the second part of speech
this word derives from is this

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word sentire, which is Aladdin
for to feel.

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So the word resentment really
means to feel again.

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And it’s appropriate word for
someone who is bearing a grudge.

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Many of us feel old hurts and
pains again and again and, and,

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and we replay the scene.
You know how it is, admit it.

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You replay the scene in your
brain and, and, and you and you

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re victimize yourself while
while simultaneously and

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ironically promising that you’re
never going to let yourself be

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hurt like that again.
Whilst you are thinking about

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the thing that hurts you, whilst
you are hurting yourself again,

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right?
I see some nods.

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You know who you are, right?
Right.

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I believe that all of us
struggle with this.

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So what can we do about it?
Perhaps one of the best things

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we can do about it is to look at
the example in scripture of one

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who overcame resentment.
Now Leviticus says you should

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not hate your brother in your
heart and the Bible reads,

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leaves a record of a man that
did hate his brother in his

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heart and he appeared to have
every valid reason to do so.

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And his name was Judah.
Now consider, consider for a

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moment Judah.
Judah goes from hating his

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brother to selling him into
slavery to lying about it to his

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father.
This is notice the downward

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trend here.
It’s not getting any better,

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right?
He runs away from the ecclesia,

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then he marries in the world.
Oh, and then he falls into

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sexual sin.
This is Judah.

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And then he sacrifices himself
or his father.

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How does someone go from there
back up to here?

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How does that happen?
How can I do that?

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How can you do that?
So in our first 3 1/2 studies

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together, we’re going to see how
Judah unwillingly falls into the

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pit of resentment.
In our last 1 1/2 studies, we’re

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going to see how God lifts him
out of that pit and restores

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him.
So for today’s class, we’re

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going to look at where Judah’s
resentment originated, and we’ll

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conclude with some thoughts
about how the process of

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resentment works within us, if
that’s OK, brothers and sisters.

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Now Judah was born the fourth
son of Jacob by his mother Leia.

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His name means praise, and upon
his birth his mother says in

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Genesis 29 and verse 35, his
mother says, Now I will praise

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the Lord.
Therefore she called his name

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Judah and left bearing.
Now, perhaps more than anything,

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I think this speaks to the
character of Leah, a woman that

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called on God’s memorial name
and praise.

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I mean, she goes from seeking
the praise and approval of her

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husband.
Remember she called Levi Levi

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because she’s saying, now my
husband will be joined unto me.

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She’s seeking what she’s seeking
the approval and affections of

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her husband.
And now with with, with Judah,

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she’s she’s calling on God’s
name and praise and she appears

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to have adopted the God of Jacob
as her own.

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But, but Jacob doesn’t see her
in this light.

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So perhaps blinded by Rachel’s
beauty or being deceived, angry,

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being deceived at Laban
Scripture uses really strong

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language to describe the state
of Leah in this household.

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And turn with me to Genesis
chapter 29 and we’re going to

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look at this verses 30 and 31.
And it says there Jacob went in

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unto Rachel, and he loved also
Rachel more than Leah, and

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served with him yet seven other
years.

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And the Lord saw that Leah was
hated, and he opened her womb,

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but Rachel was barren.
So Leah was hated and God saw

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it.
Now we know that Leah was not as

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pretty as her sister, but you
wonder for a moment, what did

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Judah and his brethren see when
they looked at Leah?

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Do you think to them that Leah
was beautiful?

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To me my mother is beautiful.
And I thought that before I had

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any concept of of looks or
attraction.

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You know, a mother is beautiful
because of the way she loves her

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child.
You know the, the way a child is

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loved by a it’s, it’s different
than any love a man ever

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receives in any other part of
his life.

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Listen, wives, you know you
don’t love us the way our

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mothers did.
You know we still, you know you

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don’t, right?
And for a while, we resented you

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for it, right?
It’s a special type of love

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because it is just like, you
know, I could, I listen, my,

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I’ve done a lot of bad things
and my mom defended me for most

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of them.
You know, my wife doesn’t do

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that, right?
And it’s a special thing, you

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know?
So, so you know, Can you

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imagine?
I just want you to imagine Judah

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not being able to understand
Jacob’s disposition towards his

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mother that that although she
was devoted to the chores and

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requirements of the household,
that she was clearly second

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best.
Now have you ever seen your

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mother cry?
Did you want to save her?

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Do you want to rescue her?
So how was Judah understand that

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all his mother was faithful and
she loved the Lord and she

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devoted herself to the family?
That all she got was constant

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heartache being a a distant
second in her husband’s

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affections.
You know there’s no justice in

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it.
There’s no right in it See

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resentment.
It typically stems from a real

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or perceived injustice and I
think this is where the seeds of

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Jews resentment come from.
I, I try, I scanned the web to

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find a, a, a picture that could
capture the essence of what

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injustice feels like.
And I think you’re going to, I

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think you’re going to sympathize
with this picture.

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You know what?
What do you think?

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Right?
I mean, clearly resentment is

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not a problem only for adults is
what that tells you right away,

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right?
So, but, but more to the point,

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at what age you think that that
Judah and his brethren began to

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realize that Leah was not the
only victim of Jacob’s

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favoritism?
At what age did he suspect that

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Jacob’s favoritism, it carried
over to the next generation?

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You know, suspicions would have
started young, but they would

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have been confirmed in
adolescence.

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And I tell you the point in
which they were crystallized.

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Turn with me over to Genesis
chapter 33, verses 1 and 2,

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where these suspicions and
concerns were crystallized in in

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the young mind of Judah.
Genesis chapter 33 and turning

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in at verse one.
And Jacob lifted up his eyes and

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looked, And behold, Esau came,
and with him 400 men.

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And he divided the children unto
Leah, and unto Rachel, and unto

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the two handmaids.
And he put the handmaids and

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their children foremost, and
Leah and her children after, and

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Rachel and Joseph hindmost.
It doesn’t take any kind of

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degree in military strategy to
understand Jacob’s intentions

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here.
You can imagine Judah looking at

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the situation and realizing to
himself, wow, if someone has to

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die, my father would prefer it
was me, my brethren and my

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mother before Rachel and Joseph.
You know, at this point he would

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become hyper aware of Joseph.
He would he would look for any

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evidence of special treatment
and there was evidence of

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special treatment.
And when he found it, he would

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wince in pain because his worst
fears were being realized.

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See, deep inside every child you
know, this is a deep desire to

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be loved because love fills an
unconscious and deep need for

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security.
Children feel safe when they’re

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loved because their existence
depends on the unselfish love of

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their parents.
So if parental love is

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threatened in any way, real or
perceived, you’re going to feel

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it instantly.
You’re going to feel it deeply.

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And in Judah’s case, resentment
is not born out of perceived

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injustice, but injustice
regarding a deep and instinctual

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need for security.
And what greater security can

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you have than when being
threatened by an enemy that your

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father’s terrified is going to
kill you?

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So in Genesis 37, as Jacob’s
sons grow in strength and

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independence, their insecurity
and pain is transformed into

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another feeling, and that’s
described to us in the Bible as

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hatred.
And turn over to Genesis chapter

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00:15:25,080 –> 00:15:29,440
37 now, and we’re going to look
at verses 3:00 to 4:00.

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00:15:31,280 –> 00:15:35,560
Now Israel loved Joseph more
than all his children because he

219
00:15:35,560 –> 00:15:39,760
was the son of his old age and
made him a coat of many colors.

220
00:15:40,800 –> 00:15:45,360
When his brethren saw that their
father loved Joseph more than

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00:15:45,360 –> 00:15:50,440
all his brethren, they hated
Joseph and could not speak

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00:15:50,440 –> 00:15:54,440
peaceably unto him.
Now we learn more about the

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00:15:54,440 –> 00:15:56,720
brother’s feelings in verses
8:00 and 11:00.

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00:15:58,600 –> 00:16:01,960
In verse 8 we read, And the
brethren said unto Joseph, Shalt

225
00:16:01,960 –> 00:16:05,240
thou indeed reign over us, or
shalt thou indeed have dominion

226
00:16:05,240 –> 00:16:08,720
over us?
And they hated him yet more for

227
00:16:08,720 –> 00:16:12,320
his dreams and for his words.
And in verse 11 we read, And the

228
00:16:12,320 –> 00:16:15,920
brethren envied him, but his
father observed the saying.

229
00:16:16,640 –> 00:16:20,200
So here we come to one of the
inevitable outcomes of

230
00:16:20,200 –> 00:16:22,520
resentment.
I’m going to describe to you 3

231
00:16:22,520 –> 00:16:24,440
inevitable symptoms of
resentment.

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00:16:25,320 –> 00:16:27,480
Sometimes you don’t know if you
have resentment, but you can see

233
00:16:27,480 –> 00:16:31,680
the symptoms and one of the
symptoms of resentment is

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00:16:31,720 –> 00:16:34,920
displaced anger.
It’s a displaced anger is a is a

235
00:16:34,920 –> 00:16:40,880
new term for an old idea.
It occurs when, with, when, who

236
00:16:40,880 –> 00:16:43,920
or what you’re venting your
anger at is not ultimately the

237
00:16:43,920 –> 00:16:47,440
source of your anger.
Everyone knows this.

238
00:16:47,680 –> 00:16:53,480
I I come home from work and
Alyssa’s had a bad day and she’s

239
00:16:53,480 –> 00:16:55,280
been looking forward to me
coming home from work.

240
00:16:56,240 –> 00:17:00,400
But then I do one thing out of
place and now she’s mad at me.

241
00:17:01,360 –> 00:17:05,040
But she’s not mad at me, she’s
just frustrated.

242
00:17:06,000 –> 00:17:08,960
I was supposed to be the savior
and it turns out I was, I turned

243
00:17:08,960 –> 00:17:10,920
up and I was just being another
problem, right?

244
00:17:11,839 –> 00:17:18,000
Happens a lot, you know, or I’ve
had a bad day at work, right?

245
00:17:18,000 –> 00:17:22,640
And I come home, you know, and
they’re my smite again.

246
00:17:22,640 –> 00:17:25,079
I don’t like my kids are going
to listen to this recording one

247
00:17:25,079 –> 00:17:28,079
day and be upset at me.
There’s the backpack right by

248
00:17:28,079 –> 00:17:29,280
the door.
You know, you’re something in

249
00:17:29,400 –> 00:17:31,320
you trip over it.
Any dad’s ever tripped over the

250
00:17:31,320 –> 00:17:33,160
backpack as he came through the
door, right?

251
00:17:33,480 –> 00:17:35,320
Anything.
What is this backpack?

252
00:17:35,320 –> 00:17:37,440
I’m not angry at the backpack
I’m missing.

253
00:17:37,480 –> 00:17:39,720
I’m angry at the stress I’ve had
that day.

254
00:17:40,120 –> 00:17:43,920
I’m displacing the anger.
I’m putting it at the thing I

255
00:17:43,920 –> 00:17:48,560
can, I can kick the thing I can,
I can take out my frustration

256
00:17:48,560 –> 00:17:51,520
on.
So Judah’s and his brother’s

257
00:17:51,520 –> 00:17:53,880
first problem with Joseph isn’t
Joseph.

258
00:17:54,800 –> 00:17:57,040
It was the love and emotional
security they didn’t receive

259
00:17:57,040 –> 00:18:00,640
from their father, but put it in
a position where they couldn’t

260
00:18:00,640 –> 00:18:06,520
direct that fear and anger
towards their father.

261
00:18:06,520 –> 00:18:09,120
They displaced it and they put
it on Joseph.

262
00:18:10,640 –> 00:18:13,000
See, Judah knew something really
well.

263
00:18:13,000 –> 00:18:16,360
Do you know what he knew?
He knew what it was like to be

264
00:18:16,360 –> 00:18:20,040
second place in the household.
He’d seen it.

265
00:18:20,800 –> 00:18:24,520
How many countless times had he
seen his mother’s tears as Jacob

266
00:18:24,520 –> 00:18:28,600
once again and went into
Rachel’s tent and not Leah’s

267
00:18:28,600 –> 00:18:31,160
tent?
How many times had he seen his

268
00:18:31,160 –> 00:18:35,120
mother’s extraordinary efforts
and hard work and diligence not

269
00:18:35,120 –> 00:18:37,480
go rewarded for any praise or
affections?

270
00:18:38,680 –> 00:18:41,240
See, he knew what it was like to
be second best and he wanted no

271
00:18:41,240 –> 00:18:44,320
part of it.
Now.

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00:18:44,320 –> 00:18:47,680
It’s fascinating to me that the
two attitudes that Judah and his

273
00:18:47,680 –> 00:18:50,720
brethren demonstrate towards
Joseph we’re told there in

274
00:18:50,720 –> 00:18:52,680
chapter 37, there are two things
we’re told.

275
00:18:52,920 –> 00:18:56,240
One is hate and the other is
envy.

276
00:18:57,880 –> 00:19:02,040
Now it’s probably not
coincidence that these are the

277
00:19:02,200 –> 00:19:07,280
exact 2 attitudes that Judah
would experience growing up,

278
00:19:08,080 –> 00:19:09,840
right?
We already read about hate,

279
00:19:09,840 –> 00:19:13,720
didn’t we, when which says that
Leah was hated and and so God

280
00:19:13,720 –> 00:19:15,680
opened her womb.
But what about envy?

281
00:19:15,840 –> 00:19:20,560
We read about envy in Genesis
chapter 30 verse one.

282
00:19:21,080 –> 00:19:24,640
We read there and Rachel saw
that she bared Jacob no children

283
00:19:24,640 –> 00:19:29,120
and Rachel envied her sister and
said to Jacob give me children

284
00:19:29,120 –> 00:19:32,320
else I die.
So what this table shows is is

285
00:19:32,320 –> 00:19:34,720
what what Judah learned as a
child.

286
00:19:35,360 –> 00:19:38,680
He learned envy and he saw
hatred.

287
00:19:40,240 –> 00:19:43,120
Well, it just so happens that
what does he act out as an

288
00:19:43,120 –> 00:19:48,240
adult?
His brethren envied him and they

289
00:19:48,240 –> 00:19:54,280
hated him.
We can observe this irony.

290
00:19:55,120 –> 00:20:01,600
Hurt people seem to hurt people
the way they were hurt.

291
00:20:04,200 –> 00:20:06,280
Just observe that for a moment.
Do you see that to be true in

292
00:20:06,280 –> 00:20:11,400
yourself?
Hurt people seem to hurt people

293
00:20:13,080 –> 00:20:16,200
often the way they were hurt.
I’ll give you a obvious example

294
00:20:16,200 –> 00:20:20,880
right there from Genesis.
You think Jacob liked it that

295
00:20:22,480 –> 00:20:24,520
Isaac seemed to favor Esau over
him.

296
00:20:25,720 –> 00:20:27,320
You think he liked that kind of
favoritism.

297
00:20:28,600 –> 00:20:33,800
But what does he do to his kids?
Hurt people seem to hurt people

298
00:20:33,800 –> 00:20:39,080
often the way they’ve been hurt.
So the point here is that is

299
00:20:39,080 –> 00:20:41,480
that Judas suffered in a home
full of of what?

300
00:20:41,480 –> 00:20:44,360
Two things, hatred and envy.
And he does the same.

301
00:20:44,520 –> 00:20:48,960
And that takes us to a second
symptom of resentment, which is,

302
00:20:49,040 –> 00:20:54,920
which is modeling.
Judah models the behaviors that

303
00:20:54,920 –> 00:20:58,000
hurt him.
It’s not that Judas set out to

304
00:20:58,000 –> 00:21:00,760
be hypocrite.
It’s just that modeling is

305
00:21:00,760 –> 00:21:03,240
unfortunately a common outcome
of resentment.

306
00:21:05,920 –> 00:21:09,920
See this word envy in Genesis
37, verse 11.

307
00:21:10,520 –> 00:21:13,040
This, this is an interesting
word, right?

308
00:21:13,360 –> 00:21:18,560
It, it’s the word kana QANA
kana, right?

309
00:21:18,960 –> 00:21:25,360
And it, it drives from an Arabic
word which means to become very

310
00:21:25,360 –> 00:21:32,160
red, right?
And and it’s meaning is to burn

311
00:21:32,600 –> 00:21:37,280
with zeal for any purpose or
anything to excite to jealousy.

312
00:21:37,480 –> 00:21:43,760
No, this, this is it wasn’t like
envy going Oh yeah, I like her

313
00:21:43,760 –> 00:21:45,960
sweater.
I’d look better in that sweater

314
00:21:45,960 –> 00:21:48,640
than she would.
Not that I’ll tell her yet.

315
00:21:51,080 –> 00:21:52,760
It’s not that kind of envy,
right?

316
00:21:52,920 –> 00:21:56,720
This is this is this is in the,
this is in the depths of your,

317
00:21:56,960 –> 00:21:59,920
you know, your stomach’s
burning, right?

318
00:22:00,160 –> 00:22:04,560
They become very red for a thing
like your, your facial

319
00:22:04,560 –> 00:22:07,480
complexion is starting to change
color, right?

320
00:22:08,400 –> 00:22:12,000
Because in, in with in your
insides.

321
00:22:13,600 –> 00:22:15,840
And do you think you can control
a feeling like that?

322
00:22:16,320 –> 00:22:17,960
You think you want to turn that
on?

323
00:22:18,960 –> 00:22:20,880
You think you wake up in the
morning going, do you know what

324
00:22:20,880 –> 00:22:22,920
I want to do today?
I’ll take out the garbage and

325
00:22:22,920 –> 00:22:25,720
then I’ll sit there and become
red and feel horrible, right?

326
00:22:27,120 –> 00:22:32,160
You don’t ask for that feeling.
It sits there and you can’t wish

327
00:22:32,160 –> 00:22:34,000
it away.
Ever had one of those feelings?

328
00:22:34,000 –> 00:22:37,760
You just wish it away going,
God, I do not want this feeling.

329
00:22:39,200 –> 00:22:40,840
You can’t wish that feeling
away.

330
00:22:40,840 –> 00:22:47,000
You know, if they’re not
intellectualizing this, they’re

331
00:22:47,000 –> 00:22:52,000
not saying, you know, that
Joseph chap, he’s a bit of a

332
00:22:52,000 –> 00:22:55,400
goody goody, isn’t he?
You know this isn’t a mental

333
00:22:55,400 –> 00:22:59,200
thing, right?
They’re they’re feeling this

334
00:22:59,200 –> 00:23:02,760
envy in the in the depth of
their gut.

335
00:23:02,880 –> 00:23:05,560
It says they couldn’t speak
peace to him.

336
00:23:05,680 –> 00:23:09,760
They couldn’t speak Shalom.
What do you tell me?

337
00:23:09,760 –> 00:23:12,520
How do you speak peace when
you’re not feeling any peace?

338
00:23:13,800 –> 00:23:18,200
There’s no peace in Khanna.
Khanna is the opposite of peace.

339
00:23:19,400 –> 00:23:24,720
Khanna is burning up with envy.
And that’s where the brethren

340
00:23:24,720 –> 00:23:30,040
were at this point in time.
They’re fueled by insecurity.

341
00:23:30,040 –> 00:23:32,480
They feel a deep sense of
injustice.

342
00:23:34,320 –> 00:23:37,520
And when you have envy deeply
burning inside of you, what do

343
00:23:37,520 –> 00:23:44,120
you do admit to yourself?
Have you ever felt that burning

344
00:23:44,120 –> 00:23:46,600
sense of agitation inside of
you?

345
00:23:46,760 –> 00:23:49,760
Have you struck out as a result
of that?

346
00:23:51,320 –> 00:23:54,120
Have you struck out in violence
as a result of that?

347
00:23:58,000 –> 00:24:00,080
Ever done something you’re
ashamed of because it was the

348
00:24:00,120 –> 00:24:02,440
only way you knew to calm that
inner man?

349
00:24:05,960 –> 00:24:08,720
In this situation, Judah and his
brethren can’t help but lash out

350
00:24:08,720 –> 00:24:13,800
of their brother.
As we know the brothers anger

351
00:24:13,800 –> 00:24:16,640
and resentment was exacerbated
by Joseph’s dreams.

352
00:24:16,640 –> 00:24:20,320
And the brothers say to Joseph
in Genesis 37, verse 8, Shalt

353
00:24:20,320 –> 00:24:23,280
thou indeed reign over us, or
shalt thou indeed have dominion

354
00:24:23,280 –> 00:24:26,200
over us?
And they hated him yet more for

355
00:24:26,200 –> 00:24:31,080
his dreams and for his words.
And when we’re in a deep sense

356
00:24:31,320 –> 00:24:36,200
state of hurt and envy, the
brothers intuitively and

357
00:24:36,200 –> 00:24:40,200
unconsciously perform the third
symptom of resentment.

358
00:24:41,440 –> 00:24:45,360
And that third symptom is skewed
judgement.

359
00:24:47,440 –> 00:24:51,920
And of course, when they judge
the brothers, judge Joseph,

360
00:24:51,920 –> 00:24:54,800
they, they twist all the
information in the worst

361
00:24:54,800 –> 00:24:58,840
possible way.
You know how this works, right?

362
00:24:58,840 –> 00:25:02,880
When you’re in a grumpy state of
mind, you know, You know how

363
00:25:02,880 –> 00:25:06,400
you’re a state of that mind
where every tone of voice is too

364
00:25:06,400 –> 00:25:10,880
sarcastic, right?
Every duty we have to do, it’s

365
00:25:10,880 –> 00:25:13,440
just evidence that no one else
in the Ecologia cares but me,

366
00:25:13,960 –> 00:25:17,680
right?
Every, every question you’re,

367
00:25:17,760 –> 00:25:22,640
you’re asked just offends you
and you become defensive and

368
00:25:22,640 –> 00:25:30,800
sensitive about everything.
Those around you, they avoid you

369
00:25:31,840 –> 00:25:36,120
because they can’t do anything
right when you’re around and and

370
00:25:36,120 –> 00:25:40,920
you interpret all information
through the distorted lens of

371
00:25:40,920 –> 00:25:45,480
your agitation.
And when you’re like this, it’s

372
00:25:45,480 –> 00:25:50,080
as if your brain is in this
panic.

373
00:25:50,560 –> 00:25:55,360
Define any any evidence to
support or justify or

374
00:25:55,360 –> 00:25:59,080
rationalize your obnoxious point
of view and hateful disposition.

375
00:25:59,240 –> 00:26:02,640
Because darn it, if enough
people are doing enough

376
00:26:02,920 –> 00:26:05,800
annoying, aggravating and
hurtful things, then your bad

377
00:26:05,800 –> 00:26:11,200
attitude is justified.
So you’re looking for any shred

378
00:26:11,200 –> 00:26:14,680
of evidence you can that makes
the inside feel right.

379
00:26:17,120 –> 00:26:19,040
And what’s the only answer when
you’re like that?

380
00:26:22,240 –> 00:26:26,360
I’m going for a run.
You take a shower.

381
00:26:28,560 –> 00:26:30,960
I’ll see you when I get back.
Because we’re not going to have

382
00:26:30,960 –> 00:26:32,680
a constructive conversation
right now.

383
00:26:38,540 –> 00:26:42,580
And so and so the brothers, they
don’t hear Joseph’s dream is my

384
00:26:42,580 –> 00:26:44,420
point.
They don’t hear it.

385
00:26:45,340 –> 00:26:47,860
They don’t consider the matter
like Jacob did.

386
00:26:48,220 –> 00:26:51,160
And and light of their
resentments and hurts, they

387
00:26:51,160 –> 00:26:55,040
unconsciously judge the dreams
in the worst possible light.

388
00:26:55,320 –> 00:26:59,600
Now the judgement was to hate
him yet more for his dreams.

389
00:27:00,760 –> 00:27:06,400
Yet here’s the irony.
Joseph’s dreams did not foretell

390
00:27:06,400 –> 00:27:10,840
their harm, but their good.
Now consider the matter from

391
00:27:10,840 –> 00:27:13,480
God’s point of view.
What was God accomplishing

392
00:27:13,520 –> 00:27:15,200
through that dream?
Do you know, we don’t have to

393
00:27:15,200 –> 00:27:19,920
guess because the scriptures,
they give us the example of what

394
00:27:19,920 –> 00:27:23,560
God had in mind in the dream.
We, we go to one of those really

395
00:27:23,560 –> 00:27:27,160
useful chapters, Psalm 105,
where, where the psalmist is

396
00:27:27,160 –> 00:27:30,680
giving a retelling of the, of
the history of Israel to the

397
00:27:30,680 –> 00:27:33,600
people and in a, in a poem and
song, so they will remember

398
00:27:33,600 –> 00:27:36,720
their own history.
And, and the psalmist interprets

399
00:27:36,720 –> 00:27:39,400
what’s going on here.
And we read this in Psalm one O

400
00:27:39,400 –> 00:27:45,400
5, verses 20 and 21 and skipping
to verse 24, it says there the

401
00:27:45,400 –> 00:27:49,280
king being Pharaoh loosed him,
meaning Joseph, the key.

402
00:27:49,280 –> 00:27:53,320
The Pharaoh loosed Joseph, even
the ruler of the people and let

403
00:27:53,320 –> 00:27:56,640
him go free.
He made him Lord of his house

404
00:27:56,760 –> 00:27:58,160
and ruler of his all his
substance.

405
00:27:58,160 –> 00:28:00,360
So that’s the, that’s the
fulfillment of that dream, is it

406
00:28:00,360 –> 00:28:03,120
not?
And then verse 24 says this.

407
00:28:04,000 –> 00:28:08,160
And he increased his people
greatly and made them stronger

408
00:28:08,160 –> 00:28:11,840
than their enemies.
Did it ever cross Joseph’s

409
00:28:11,840 –> 00:28:15,840
brothers minds at all?
That maybe, just maybe their

410
00:28:15,840 –> 00:28:17,680
brother reigning over them was a
good thing?

411
00:28:20,960 –> 00:28:22,640
That God was doing it for a
purpose?

412
00:28:24,440 –> 00:28:26,560
That Joseph, whose name means
what?

413
00:28:28,320 –> 00:28:35,440
The increaser, right, that God
might be using Joseph to

414
00:28:35,440 –> 00:28:40,200
increase his people to make them
stronger than their enemies.

415
00:28:41,840 –> 00:28:45,720
You see one another symptom of
resentment is a complete lack of

416
00:28:45,720 –> 00:28:49,920
optimism, right?
It’s skewed judgement.

417
00:28:50,280 –> 00:28:55,120
You are interpreting information
pessimistically based on

418
00:28:55,120 –> 00:28:57,440
feelings.
In this case, the brothers were

419
00:28:57,440 –> 00:29:00,240
saying that that Joseph would
never reign over them wrong.

420
00:29:01,320 –> 00:29:04,160
And then they said they thought,
they thought that if he did run

421
00:29:04,160 –> 00:29:07,720
over them, it’d be bad for them.
Wrong again.

422
00:29:09,800 –> 00:29:14,240
But their minds interpret and
respond to their pessimistic

423
00:29:14,240 –> 00:29:16,440
assumptions about the future as
if they were fact.

424
00:29:16,440 –> 00:29:18,120
In fact.
I want to, I want to outline

425
00:29:18,120 –> 00:29:22,680
this because this is so
important, how this process

426
00:29:22,680 –> 00:29:27,360
works to create sin within us.
OK, as I, as I go through this,

427
00:29:27,560 –> 00:29:30,280
I wrote, I wrote this out of my
own personal experience and

428
00:29:30,280 –> 00:29:32,840
maybe this relates to you too.
I think, I think we’re made of

429
00:29:32,840 –> 00:29:36,520
the same stuff.
So probably here’s how it works

430
00:29:36,520 –> 00:29:38,040
in the mind of a resentful
person.

431
00:29:38,560 –> 00:29:41,760
They take limited information.
In this case, the brothers took

432
00:29:41,760 –> 00:29:45,560
Joseph’s retelling of the dream.
They take limited information,

433
00:29:46,240 –> 00:29:50,360
yes, but then we interpret that
in the worst way possible.

434
00:29:51,760 –> 00:29:56,960
And then we make pessimistic
assumptions based on our

435
00:29:56,960 –> 00:30:00,520
interpretation.
So by the way, assumptions based

436
00:30:00,520 –> 00:30:06,680
on interpretations, dangerous
things, then then what we do,

437
00:30:06,680 –> 00:30:08,640
no, that’s not enough, right?
That’s right.

438
00:30:08,640 –> 00:30:10,000
Right away, you’re in a bad
space.

439
00:30:10,000 –> 00:30:15,440
But no, we go on, We’re going to
treat those assumptions as if

440
00:30:15,440 –> 00:30:21,160
they’re unbiased facts, and then
we’re going to act accordingly,

441
00:30:21,520 –> 00:30:23,120
thinking that we’re doing what’s
right.

442
00:30:26,240 –> 00:30:32,920
Is this not how it works?
Limited information, interpreted

443
00:30:35,280 –> 00:30:38,760
assumptions based on that
limited information the most

444
00:30:38,760 –> 00:30:41,960
pessimistic way possible.
But now I’m going to act on

445
00:30:41,960 –> 00:30:45,000
those assumptions and I’m going
to say, well, I’m totally

446
00:30:45,000 –> 00:30:46,400
justified.
Why?

447
00:30:46,400 –> 00:30:51,000
Because I’ve assumed based on
interpretation and then my mind

448
00:30:51,160 –> 00:30:53,360
is pessimistic.
But you know what?

449
00:30:53,680 –> 00:30:57,880
If I plan for the worst case
scenario, I guess I’m going to

450
00:30:57,880 –> 00:31:03,440
be all right no matter what.
And weren’t.

451
00:31:03,440 –> 00:31:06,000
This is exactly the process the
brothers went down as they

452
00:31:06,000 –> 00:31:11,080
looked at Joseph’s dream.
What could make someone act this

453
00:31:11,080 –> 00:31:15,080
way with this variety and type
of skewed judgment?

454
00:31:16,360 –> 00:31:19,280
Resentment.
What is resentment?

455
00:31:19,560 –> 00:31:23,520
It’s feeling again.
It’s feeling again a real or

456
00:31:23,520 –> 00:31:28,240
imagined wrong.
So let’s explore how resentment

457
00:31:28,240 –> 00:31:30,600
happens and why it’s so
fundamental to the way that

458
00:31:30,600 –> 00:31:33,320
Judah acts.
See, one of the clearest

459
00:31:33,440 –> 00:31:36,800
descriptions that resent we have
in all the Bible is actually

460
00:31:36,800 –> 00:31:39,160
found in First Corinthians
chapter 13, which is not where

461
00:31:39,160 –> 00:31:41,800
you’d expect to find it.
Is it First Corinthians chapter

462
00:31:41,800 –> 00:31:44,240
13 and verse 5?
I’m going to read this out of

463
00:31:44,240 –> 00:31:50,600
the NIV.
It says there love does not

464
00:31:50,600 –> 00:31:56,160
dishonor others, it is not self
seeking, it is not easily

465
00:31:56,160 –> 00:32:02,040
angered, it keeps no record of
wrongs.

466
00:32:03,280 –> 00:32:07,640
Now the RSV actually puts here
next to 1st Corinthians chapter

467
00:32:07,640 –> 00:32:11,200
13 verse 5.
The RSV actually puts in love is

468
00:32:11,200 –> 00:32:15,760
not resentful.
But actually, the words

469
00:32:15,760 –> 00:32:18,480
expressed at the NIV are the
better translation.

470
00:32:19,680 –> 00:32:22,280
Love keeps no record of wrongs.
That’s really what the Greek is

471
00:32:22,280 –> 00:32:24,880
getting at.
Both, by the way, are better

472
00:32:24,880 –> 00:32:27,160
than the King James of love
thinketh no evil.

473
00:32:28,520 –> 00:32:31,680
OK, now those of us struggle
that struggle with resentment.

474
00:32:32,080 –> 00:32:33,880
You know, we keep a record of
wrongs.

475
00:32:34,120 –> 00:32:35,440
You know, we keep a record of
wrongs.

476
00:32:35,560 –> 00:32:38,200
Like the bank has gave me a
record of my mortgage, right?

477
00:32:38,520 –> 00:32:40,160
It’s not going to miss a cent,
right?

478
00:32:40,520 –> 00:32:42,200
It knows down to the penny what
I owe.

479
00:32:44,480 –> 00:32:47,560
Now, Paul uses the same word
here.

480
00:32:47,800 –> 00:32:50,600
Keep a record of that same word
there.

481
00:32:50,600 –> 00:32:52,880
Keep a record of.
He uses that a little bit later

482
00:32:52,880 –> 00:32:56,440
in First Corinthians chapter 13
to help us even get a richer

483
00:32:56,440 –> 00:32:59,680
sense of what this word keep a
record of is about.

484
00:33:00,240 –> 00:33:03,200
Now, if you go down a little bit
in the chapter, you look at

485
00:33:03,200 –> 00:33:05,640
verse 11.
What we read there in verse 11

486
00:33:05,640 –> 00:33:08,520
is this.
When I was a child, I spoke as a

487
00:33:08,520 –> 00:33:12,520
child.
I thought as a child, I reasoned

488
00:33:13,840 –> 00:33:18,640
like a child.
When I became a man, I gave up

489
00:33:19,160 –> 00:33:23,840
childish ways.
So the word to keep a record of

490
00:33:24,120 –> 00:33:30,160
is the same word in verse 11
reasoned When I was a child, I

491
00:33:30,160 –> 00:33:33,200
kept.
When I was a child, I kept

492
00:33:33,240 –> 00:33:36,600
records like a child is what it
actually means.

493
00:33:36,960 –> 00:33:41,080
When I was a child, I kept
records like a child.

494
00:33:41,280 –> 00:33:46,440
Now, I don’t know how your kids
keep records, right?

495
00:33:47,720 –> 00:33:49,920
But you know how my keep kids
keep records.

496
00:33:50,080 –> 00:33:53,600
Now we have a certain language
you don’t allow in our house.

497
00:33:53,600 –> 00:33:55,520
Do you have language you don’t
allow in your house?

498
00:33:55,760 –> 00:33:58,440
We don’t have There’s a there’s
a word that begins with F4

499
00:33:58,440 –> 00:34:00,200
letters long.
We don’t allow that word in our

500
00:34:00,200 –> 00:34:01,960
house.
Do you know what that word is?

501
00:34:03,640 –> 00:34:05,120
Well, let me just put it this
way.

502
00:34:05,880 –> 00:34:09,840
When you were raising your
children, what is the number one

503
00:34:09,840 –> 00:34:11,719
thing that they complained you
about?

504
00:34:11,719 –> 00:34:17,280
When they come back and they say
Mommy, Mommy, they say it’s not,

505
00:34:18,760 –> 00:34:21,719
it’s not fair, right?
We don’t allow that word.

506
00:34:21,719 –> 00:34:25,360
It’s a naughty word.
That is a naughty word in the

507
00:34:25,360 –> 00:34:28,639
Brinkerhoff household.
It’s funny.

508
00:34:28,840 –> 00:34:32,719
They never seem to say that when
the when the when the split is

509
00:34:32,719 –> 00:34:36,320
to their advantage.
You know, I’m not to this, dad.

510
00:34:36,320 –> 00:34:39,360
Never heard one of my kids come
up and say Mommy, Mommy, it’s

511
00:34:39,360 –> 00:34:41,040
not fair.
I got too much ice cream.

512
00:34:42,920 –> 00:34:46,360
Yeah, you know, Mommy and Mommy,
it’s not fair.

513
00:34:46,480 –> 00:34:48,920
I got a longer, longer turn on
the slide.

514
00:34:48,960 –> 00:34:51,800
You know that just that never
seems to happen that way.

515
00:34:54,320 –> 00:34:58,200
You know, fundamental to the way
that children reason is that

516
00:34:58,200 –> 00:35:00,080
they keep records.
Admit it.

517
00:35:00,280 –> 00:35:02,640
Admit it to yourself.
Those who have children, raise

518
00:35:02,640 –> 00:35:04,400
your hand if your kids kept
records.

519
00:35:05,680 –> 00:35:06,960
Oh, some of you have Angel
children.

520
00:35:06,960 –> 00:35:09,080
Who has Angel children, right?
Right.

521
00:35:10,360 –> 00:35:12,120
Jonathan, I know better than
that.

522
00:35:12,280 –> 00:35:18,160
Right, I, I have something I was
going to say, but I’m going to

523
00:35:18,160 –> 00:35:19,480
keep it right to myself right
now.

524
00:35:19,480 –> 00:35:22,440
That’s right.
All right, self-control, right.

525
00:35:22,720 –> 00:35:29,520
So, so let me draw a little
sketch right on the now I’m

526
00:35:29,520 –> 00:35:31,640
going to draw, I’m going to show
you a little sketch about how I

527
00:35:31,640 –> 00:35:33,760
think a child’s brain probably
works, right?

528
00:35:34,840 –> 00:35:36,760
You see a seesaw to balance,
right?

529
00:35:36,960 –> 00:35:38,400
Because everything is a
comparison.

530
00:35:38,680 –> 00:35:41,400
Everything is a balance.
And at that middle of the

531
00:35:41,400 –> 00:35:43,240
balance is our perception of
Fair.

532
00:35:44,000 –> 00:35:47,120
OK, Now as we look at this
sketch, I want to introduce

533
00:35:47,720 –> 00:35:49,320
something we’re going to be
referring to quite a bit in

534
00:35:49,320 –> 00:35:51,880
these studies, which are the
five selves of sin.

535
00:35:52,640 –> 00:35:55,080
And the five selves of sin are
these.

536
00:35:55,680 –> 00:35:58,600
And it begins with self
importance.

537
00:35:59,920 –> 00:36:05,920
Now as self important people, we
think as a default I deserve to

538
00:36:05,920 –> 00:36:13,280
have or I expect to have just as
much or a little bit more than

539
00:36:13,280 –> 00:36:16,400
the next person because by
definition I’m self important.

540
00:36:17,880 –> 00:36:20,200
Now thinking this way, this
leads to what?

541
00:36:21,040 –> 00:36:25,080
This leads to being easily hurt.
We’re always keeping records.

542
00:36:25,080 –> 00:36:28,960
We’re counting, ensuring that we
get everything that we deserve.

543
00:36:28,960 –> 00:36:33,960
And occasionally when we’re
treated in the wrong way, our

544
00:36:33,960 –> 00:36:37,400
mood fouls and we get bad
feelings and judgments and

545
00:36:37,400 –> 00:36:41,960
defensive behaviors.
So when that happens in our

546
00:36:41,960 –> 00:36:47,080
childish brain, the way we
reason as children, what happens

547
00:36:47,080 –> 00:36:49,920
is we add a little, we, we go
back to our balance and we add a

548
00:36:49,920 –> 00:36:52,840
little hurt.
So now you can see our balance

549
00:36:52,840 –> 00:36:55,800
is skewed just slightly.
You see it’s a skewed down that

550
00:36:55,800 –> 00:36:58,240
way because we have a hurt
there, right?

551
00:36:58,360 –> 00:37:00,680
We’ve been hurt.
I didn’t get what I was

552
00:37:00,680 –> 00:37:02,960
expecting to get.
I wasn’t treated the way I was

553
00:37:02,960 –> 00:37:06,320
expected to be treated.
You know, someone treated me

554
00:37:06,320 –> 00:37:09,200
badly and I’m and and I’m hurt
about that.

555
00:37:09,960 –> 00:37:13,760
And you go back to the five
selves of sin and you go, OK, we

556
00:37:13,760 –> 00:37:16,840
notice one that comes next.
This is self justification.

557
00:37:17,240 –> 00:37:20,120
And that’s what we do next.
We we notice that our little

558
00:37:20,120 –> 00:37:27,760
balance isn’t even in our mind.
It’s just or it’s right to just

559
00:37:27,760 –> 00:37:28,960
say even things out a little
bit.

560
00:37:28,960 –> 00:37:31,560
I’m just going to get even.
I’m just going to even out even

561
00:37:31,560 –> 00:37:34,040
things out.
And how do you going to do that?

562
00:37:34,440 –> 00:37:38,360
Well, there’s a million ways you
may, you may speak badly about

563
00:37:38,360 –> 00:37:42,000
that person.
You may, you may give that

564
00:37:42,000 –> 00:37:44,040
person a little bit of the
silent treatment, a little bit

565
00:37:44,040 –> 00:37:48,120
of a cold shoulder or, or, or
maybe worse, whatever it is, you

566
00:37:48,120 –> 00:37:53,600
justify it because after all,
they hurt you first and, and,

567
00:37:53,680 –> 00:37:56,360
and your way, you’re just
evening things out a bit.

568
00:37:58,120 –> 00:38:01,320
And as you might have guessed,
the words of Christ found in in

569
00:38:01,320 –> 00:38:04,880
Matthew chapter 5, you know,
love your enemies, bless those

570
00:38:04,880 –> 00:38:07,520
that curse you, do good to them
that hate you and pray for them

571
00:38:07,520 –> 00:38:09,400
that despitefully use you and
persecute you.

572
00:38:10,040 –> 00:38:14,360
Those words don’t have much
effect on the self important

573
00:38:14,360 –> 00:38:18,720
self justifying person.
So we can see now that

574
00:38:18,720 –> 00:38:24,240
resentment or holding on to the
original wrong has blinded us

575
00:38:25,280 –> 00:38:31,880
because something that’s wrong
seems right in our eyes because

576
00:38:31,960 –> 00:38:35,440
we’re the one who’s doing it.
And in our view the circumstance

577
00:38:35,440 –> 00:38:40,520
is called for it.
Of course, in this sense the

578
00:38:40,520 –> 00:38:44,440
resentment is leading to sin,
but in our view it’s justified.

579
00:38:45,840 –> 00:38:50,560
It’s justified.
Well, what that means is we

580
00:38:50,560 –> 00:38:54,240
don’t need to repent.
So we’ve slipped from self

581
00:38:54,240 –> 00:38:58,200
justification or getting even to
self righteousness or

582
00:38:58,200 –> 00:39:00,720
rationalizing a lack of
repentance afterwards.

583
00:39:03,640 –> 00:39:06,160
Unfortunately, though, I I don’t
know if this is how it works

584
00:39:06,160 –> 00:39:11,080
with you, but once I justify
doing the wrong thing, it

585
00:39:11,080 –> 00:39:15,480
becomes pretty easy to keep
doing it And and before long

586
00:39:15,480 –> 00:39:20,680
even expand upon it.
And and we may find that the the

587
00:39:20,680 –> 00:39:22,720
balance, unfortunately, the
balance of our child like

588
00:39:22,720 –> 00:39:25,120
reasoning.
It might even start to tip the

589
00:39:25,120 –> 00:39:28,000
wrong direction.
You know, it might be that, Gee,

590
00:39:28,000 –> 00:39:31,080
we’ve done a lot of sins and you
know that that hurt almost it

591
00:39:31,080 –> 00:39:35,320
doesn’t even, it doesn’t even
seem to rationalize our, our,

592
00:39:35,400 –> 00:39:39,040
our sinful response.
Ah, ha, ha, we have a solution

593
00:39:39,040 –> 00:39:41,840
to this problem, don’t we?
So this is where excitement

594
00:39:41,840 –> 00:39:44,520
steps in.
So in in that case, we don’t

595
00:39:44,520 –> 00:39:45,800
want this problem to last very
long.

596
00:39:46,000 –> 00:39:47,560
We just remember that hurt
again.

597
00:39:48,520 –> 00:39:54,040
Yep, And and we remember we
replayed in our minds and but,

598
00:39:54,360 –> 00:39:56,760
but we’re not too honest with
ourselves, are we?

599
00:39:57,120 –> 00:40:01,000
When we think about that
original hurt, you know we.

600
00:40:01,600 –> 00:40:07,160
We just happen to make their
part a little bit worse and we

601
00:40:07,160 –> 00:40:13,160
make our part a little bit less
and and doing this, we just make

602
00:40:13,160 –> 00:40:18,960
the hurt a little bit bigger.
Just just big enough to justify

603
00:40:19,840 –> 00:40:27,640
our attitude and anger and
negativity when we re remember.

604
00:40:28,760 –> 00:40:31,360
Do we do?
We had a little bit of

605
00:40:31,360 –> 00:40:36,000
intention.
You know, you meant to say that,

606
00:40:38,400 –> 00:40:42,520
you know, that was no accident.
Not only did you do it on

607
00:40:42,520 –> 00:40:45,680
purpose, I bet you premeditated
it.

608
00:40:47,840 –> 00:40:51,160
It’s not third degree murder.
It’s not even second degree

609
00:40:51,160 –> 00:40:52,720
murder.
It’s pre planned murder.

610
00:40:52,720 –> 00:41:00,600
It’s first degree.
We make it bigger and we start

611
00:41:00,600 –> 00:41:02,640
to get pretty good at this
justification game.

612
00:41:02,640 –> 00:41:05,960
And before long, everywhere we
turn, we find someone who’s

613
00:41:05,960 –> 00:41:10,760
annoying us or doing something
the wrong way or or saying the

614
00:41:10,760 –> 00:41:12,600
wrong thing.
We take offense at everything.

615
00:41:12,600 –> 00:41:16,120
We just pile up hurts.
We pile up resentments.

616
00:41:16,800 –> 00:41:19,440
So what are resentments,
brothers and sisters?

617
00:41:20,280 –> 00:41:21,760
I want to give it a new
definition.

618
00:41:22,880 –> 00:41:29,440
I think resentments are the fuel
that allows to feel OK doing

619
00:41:29,440 –> 00:41:36,080
what’s wrong.
Before long we find ourselves in

620
00:41:36,080 –> 00:41:40,920
a position where we literally
can’t forgive the wrongs done to

621
00:41:40,920 –> 00:41:44,440
others.
Now, why can’t you forgive the

622
00:41:44,440 –> 00:41:46,680
wrongs done to others?
If you’re full of resentment,

623
00:41:48,320 –> 00:41:52,480
how could you?
If you forgave, you’d be sitting

624
00:41:52,480 –> 00:41:56,640
on a huge pile of sins without
anything to justify them with.

625
00:41:57,960 –> 00:42:03,720
None of us are going to do that.
So we’re going to continue with

626
00:42:03,720 –> 00:42:06,840
this diagram in our future
talks.

627
00:42:07,200 –> 00:42:11,240
We’re kind of moved down the
process of the self loathing and

628
00:42:11,280 –> 00:42:15,240
self gratification.
But for the moment, I want you

629
00:42:15,240 –> 00:42:17,720
to see that this is the process
that Judah went down.

630
00:42:18,640 –> 00:42:22,000
He was the man that Paul
describes in Titus, not

631
00:42:22,000 –> 00:42:26,200
literally, but figuratively.
Paul says in Titus 3 verse 3

632
00:42:27,760 –> 00:42:31,560
that we ought to avoid those who
are full of hate, envy, living

633
00:42:31,560 –> 00:42:33,240
in malice.
Now living in malice means to

634
00:42:33,240 –> 00:42:41,400
live in ill will, living in ill
will, deceived and foolish.

635
00:42:42,640 –> 00:42:47,560
So often living in I’ll will, we
are deceived because we’re lying

636
00:42:47,560 –> 00:42:50,360
to ourselves.
We’re making it.

637
00:42:50,840 –> 00:42:53,120
We’re making a horrible
situation even worse.

638
00:42:56,600 –> 00:43:01,280
So Judah’s problem began with
hurt that was real.

639
00:43:01,800 –> 00:43:04,160
It was real, and it was
undeserved.

640
00:43:05,520 –> 00:43:10,200
It was hurt that he nursed in
his heart, and he used it to

641
00:43:10,200 –> 00:43:12,120
justify treating Joseph
Baddeley.

642
00:43:13,680 –> 00:43:15,640
But you know a funny thing about
treating Joseph Baddeley?

643
00:43:16,600 –> 00:43:18,400
It didn’t make the pain in his
heart any less.

644
00:43:20,560 –> 00:43:24,920
There was a benefit, though, of
resentment because it allowed

645
00:43:24,920 –> 00:43:28,800
Judah to justify his actions and
being justified.

646
00:43:28,800 –> 00:43:32,120
His actions grew worse and
worse, and his attitude grew

647
00:43:32,120 –> 00:43:35,960
worse and worse.
Before long, Judah was looking

648
00:43:35,960 –> 00:43:39,920
to find fault.
He was full of displaced anger.

649
00:43:40,200 –> 00:43:44,560
He was modeling hatred and envy,
and he was acting with skewed

650
00:43:44,760 –> 00:43:52,080
judgement of facts.
In Paul’s words, Judah was

651
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thinking like a child keeping
records of wrongs.

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He was counting wrongs.
Which brings us to the question,

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what wrongs are you counting?
Perhaps it’s useful in light of

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that to ask what God is
counting, because the same word

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reasoned or counting love does
not count wrongs.

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It’s it’s used often in the New
Testament that it’s, it’s the

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Greek word lozami, and it means
to reckon or count or compute or

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make a count of.
And this same word is used

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throughout the New Testament,
for example, in Romans 4 verse

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5.
But to him that worketh not, but

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believeth on him that justifieth
the godly, his faith is counted

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00:44:40,520 –> 00:44:46,040
for righteousness.
How about Romans 4 verse 8 to

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the man who the Lord will not
bless, the man to whom the Lord

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will not count sin?
That’s that one.

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00:44:55,760 –> 00:45:03,080
Yep.
Or 2nd Corinthians 5 verse 19.

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To wit, that God was in Christ
reconciling the world to

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00:45:08,560 –> 00:45:14,280
Himself, not counting trespasses
unto them, and hath committed

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00:45:14,280 –> 00:45:15,920
unto us the word of
reconciliation.

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I just want you to bear this
fact in mind, that our nature is

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very much to count, to count the
sins of others, to reason like

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00:45:31,240 –> 00:45:39,360
children.
But Christ in Christ God is not

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00:45:39,360 –> 00:45:43,360
counting trespasses, but what
does He count?

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00:45:44,960 –> 00:45:53,200
He is counting faith.
So thinking back to the balance,

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then, how does this balance work
in light of grace?

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Once you say that that
undeserved kindness of grace, it

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basically destroys this balance.
This whole tit for tat paradigm

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we seem to be born into.
See, God’s not trowning,

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00:46:14,800 –> 00:46:19,440
counting, trespasses, but let’s
be honest, we are.

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00:46:22,640 –> 00:46:25,960
So how would God take, brothers
and sisters, a man who was

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00:46:25,960 –> 00:46:31,280
caught in envy and hatred, and
transform him into a man who was

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00:46:31,280 –> 00:46:35,920
willing to sacrifice his freedom
for his father, who had not

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00:46:35,920 –> 00:46:43,960
repented of favoritism?
How did God release from Judah

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the burden of self-righteous
resentment?

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This is the question we’re going
to try to answer this week as we

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progress in our studies
together.